The Lit Department

How to be alone.

2010-08-16T18:07:00.000-07:00

Solitude... in all its luxury and/or melancholy... depicted beautifully in this video/poem/how-to:

Also, at last, a piece of literature (a poem, at that) to share on this blog.

Enjoy, my friends.

Rhetoric 101

2010-08-04T08:18:00.001-07:00

My google reader is a little thin today, thanks to unsubscribing from two sites that I have read regularly for a long time.

One site is a feminist blog that I used to love because they took a pretty broad-minded approach to issues, and had a much more casual tone than many (academic, boring, extreme) feminists blogs. The contributors always brought to my attention issues that were overlooked in the news, which I felt were worth knowing. And I appreciated the varying perspectives from different posters. And commenters. But, lately, it seems to me they've lost the forest for the trees. The site seems so angry. And uncompromising. And unwilling to give anyone the benefit of the doubt. I don't want to mention the site specifically, because they have a large following of younger feminists, and I think its a good way for those women to be exposed to a less academic viewpoint of feminism. But, between the recent zionist-leaning posts, racism-accusations, and general navel-gazing that's been going on over there. I. JUST. CANT. TAKE. IT. ANYMORE.

It's interesting, because right after I cancelled my RSS feed to that blog, I saw a twitter update from @marionnestle about the sniping tone that many commenters have taken on her site recently. She was talking specifically about the response from raw milk enthusiasts to her support for S. 510, a new piece of legislation which aims to regulate raw milk producers. Whether or not you think people should be allowed to drink raw milk, I think her post is worth reading, as it has more to do with the fact that impassioned people (on any side) can often derail a legitimate and productive debate by crossing the line into hate-filled, over-the-top, personal attacks. When did we forget how to debate in this country? When did everyone start taking things so seriously... and personally?

As a person who loves to debate, and who does so in a loud fashion, I am particularly aware of this. I try to never cross the line (but I am not perfect, and have been guilty of doing so), as I want my ideas to be heard. And when people start yelling, the funny thing is, other people usually stop listening. But the Tea Baggers, and the GOP supporters, and, YES, even progressives, are all guilty of shifting from political debate to crazy personal attacks. It's no longer a conversation of diverging viewpoints in this country, its seems to have become an all-out war.

And I don't know the solution. Maybe everyone should be forced to take an introductory class in rhetoric. There is a way to argue, and it can even involve impassioned speech. But there is no reason for it ever to become personal. If you disagree with my viewpoints, fine by me. I would love to understand why. I would not love you to tell me that I am going to hell for believing the things I do. That, my friends, is not productive.

The other site I unsubscribed to was for very different reasons. But, it also had to do with tone. I've had a love/hate relationship with Gawker.com for many years. It used to be a NYC-based media gossip site covering magazine publishing, newspapers, books, and the revolving doors at said publications. As someone who dreamed of becoming part of the NYC media elite but was stuck in a boring job in rural California, that site was manna from heaven. Seven years later, my world has changed, and so has Gawker's. I am no longer stuck in a dead-end job, and have found a home among the Boston publishing world, and meanwhile Gawker has become a catch-all site for celebrity gossip with a tiny amount of NYC-based publishing news thrown in for old time's sake. But the snark factor, which was always high, has soared to new heights recently. And today, the thing that set me off: a blind item calling out "which tween starlet has herpes?" WTF? This is what makes for a blog post these days? Jesus christ. I don't want to know. I don't want to know that other people want to know. Cue 107 comments from assholes in their mom's basements tossing around every tween (which, btw, means 11-13 year old) starlet name they can thing of, slagging them wrongfully in the process, let alone the poor girl that actually has it (if she even does... anonymous tips are oh, so reliable). I mean JESUS. I hope you are fucking proud of yourself Nick Denton.

The sad thing is, Gawker actually has done some rather journalisty reporting, and used to be a great source for publishing/media news. They often broke stories far sooner than traditional news outlets about closings, sales, layoffs, mergers, etc. But lately its all Jersey Shore, blind items, and hateful commenter vitriol. All things I can do without.

So, goodbye Gawker. Goodbye un-named feminist blog. A bit less hate in my life is fine with me. Maybe someday we will all learn to entertain and inform without resorting to the spiteful, base snark that seems to pass as news these days.

What is a Government?

2010-07-30T13:40:00.000-07:00

This isn't related to literature or arts, or anything else in the Lit Department wheelhouse, but dear lord, I am so angry that I can't see straight.

Check out this post at Shakesville with an excerpt from Ezra Klein's latest installment of dribble in the Washington Post.

I'll excerpt both here.

Ezra:

In order to get less Medicaid and teacher funding than we actually need, we're cutting food stamps by $6.7 billion (and closing some foreign tax loopholes, rescinding some spending decisions and changing Medicaid's drug pricing)
....
And here we are. Democrats needed to offset spending on two worthy, important programs. So they're cutting another important, worthy program. But you really can't think of a worse program to cut than SNAP. SNAP is an extraordinarily well-targeted stimulus. It goes to poor households, for something they need to buy. According to Mark Zandi's numbers, it's literally the most stimulative way to spend a dollar: Better than state and local aid, or unemployment insurance. You get more than $1.70 of economic activity for each buck you put in.
....
But this is also a question of priorities, of what gets cut. Bernie Sanders put up an amendment last month to cut about $35 billion in oil and gas subsidies. It failed. Republicans are arguing to extend Bush's tax cuts for the rich with no offsets, and they may well succeed. But food assistance for poor families? You can get the votes to slash those.

And Melissa @ Shakesville:

Current Department of Defense budget, including spending on "overseas contingency operations" for Fiscal Year 2010: $663.8 billion.

If defense-related expenditures budgeted by departments other than Defense are included, the US will spend, in total, between $800 billion and $1 trillion in FY2010 on defense.

And we're slashing the budget for food stamps.

And this right here is the part where my brain near exploded. Because, in my mind, this is just so blatantly and obviously backwards. But it's not backwards to many people in this country... well, assuming they've even troubled their brain to think about it. And I think for the first time I realized that the clusterfuck is happening because Democrats and Republicans will never really agree, fundamentally, what the purpose of a state is. What is the purpose of government. What do we want it to be? I don't think most citizens can agree either.

Is the government there to support and protect citizens by providing things like education and medicine and social services, and a cushion (provided by taxes we as citizens paid into) for harder times? And to provide and maintain infrastructures like roads and highways and dams so that we as citizens can live with a reasonable level of efficiency and comfort in order to go about our daily lives?

Or is it there to support industry? To put forth a foreign policy agenda? To wage wars in order to protect that industry and that foreign policy agenda? For a political party that cries all the time about Dems ruining their "free-market" economy, we sure put a FUCKING lot of resources into protecting and aiding and abetting that fucking economy.... well, at least the major players in it.

And to my mind, none of these wars (and therefore defense spending) are about protecting or supporting U.S. citizens. None of them are about protecting and supporting foreign citizens anymore either (we are so not protecting Iraqis and Afghans at this point, if we ever were). And yet..... $1 TRILLION on defense. But sorry folks, no way to pay you that $80 in food stamps.

I hear Canada is nice this time of year.

(BTW, the definition of Government on wikipedia is woefully flawed and just about the most unhelpful thing I've ever read, so, just don't.)

To LOL, or not to LOL.

2010-07-22T06:17:00.000-07:00

So, I have a confession. I LOL. And use smiley faces (but only of the colon/open parens variety; anything else is just silly). And I do it often. But, I also judge people who do this. Because LOL is not a word, and it’s lazy and it sounds ridiculous coming from a thirty-year old woman. So I never LOL with someone I’ve just met. Because if I can be so hypocritically judgmental about it, heaven forbid anyone else judge my LOLing.

I only LOL with friends who know me well. People who are past the point of judging me. Well, at least, people who have witnessed me do so many other embarrassing/lame/evil/dumb things over the course of my lifetime, that a LOL every now and then is insignificant in the grander scale of things to judge me about. Because while LOL is dumb and lazy, it’s also super convenient. It says: that was funny, I am laughing (probably on the inside) now. Hurray.
So, enter new relationship with someone, someone who texts me funny things. I want to LOL. I want to let them know I agree about the funny. But… I don’t want them to think I’m a LOLer. Not *that* kind of LOLer (think: tween girl in pigtails who says things like UR A QT). So, now, I am constantly baffled by how to respond to funny texts. Or worst yet, sarcastic texts. How do I let them know that I know that they are being sarcastic? This is killer. I don’t want them thinking that I’m a tween LOLer, but GOD FORBID they think I don’t get sarcasm. I love sarcasm. Me and sarcasm are best friends, friends with benefits even.

So, I usually just stare at my cell phone willing my hands NOT TO LOL. But, they so want to. Instead, I sometimes use Hahaha. It’s okay, kind of stilted. At least is a word (sort of...well, ok: it’s a sound, but it’s an actual sound) and is showing rather than telling (that was for you Prof. Byrd, creative writing teacher from hell). Or, there is the option of saying something equally or more funny in return. But that’s hard. And it requires that I wore my funny pants that morning, and have had enough caffeine, and that my brain will deliver the requisite amount of funny. If the text was already a funny response to a funny text I sent earlier, than I can fall back on touché. But my text software on my crappy phone doesn’t do the accent above the E, and someone recently informed me that touche (sans accent) means something else (arguably provocative) and so now then I worry that I am again being grammatically incorrect (or potentially suggestive). So if the recipient actually speaks French, touché is out.

About now is when my brain gives up—can’t take the pressure. So, I just don’t respond. Or I change the subject. And take the chance that the person on the other end of the texting either a) is hurt that I did not give the funny it’s appropriate fanfare, b) thinks I’m a droll, humorless being, or c) does not give a shit because who put this much thought into their stupid text messages.

Lesson? I guess don’t judge the judicious use of LOL. Because I only use it when I really mean: hey, if that was a line in a movie that I was watching in a theater, I probably would have laughed out loud.

No, none of this is your money.

2010-07-12T13:32:00.001-07:00

So, something pissed me off the other day. I went to the bank to cash my paycheck and they wanted $5 to cash it because I didn’t have an account with them (keep in mind this was the bank which actually cut the check). GRRR. I cash my paychecks nowadays because they have developed the bad habit of occasionally bouncing, and this tends to make my checking account overdrawn. Apparently, some employers will cover the cost of their employees cashing their paychecks, but not mine. $5 is not a lot of money to most people, but to someone making $8/hour plus tips it’s worth not just giving away. What did I do? I quickly snapped the check off the counter, quickly snapped “Thanks” to the bank clerk and drove to my bank and deposited the check (hoping my employer had the available funds to clear the check). While at my bank I asked if most banks charge to cash paychecks they had issued. Her answer was “Yes” and “Most banks do this,” which just served to piss me off even more. Now this was a universal issue! Not just little ol’ me getting screwed by the financial system.

Imagine for a second you are making minimum wage, and because of your horrid financial history (likely partially caused by unregulated and predatory lenders) a bank will not allow you to open an account with them. Every two weeks you take your paycheck to the issuing bank and pay a fee to access your hard-earned money. This SHOULD NOT be legal. Banks handle money, they cut checks, this is what they do. A clerk spending 30 seconds to cash a check does not justify a $5 service fee. Am I to believe a clerk’s time is worth $600/hour? Fuck that.

And this whole fucked-up notion of charging to access your own money has created a whole industry of shady check cashing establishments that ostensibly charge a poor tax on people that wish to access their hard-earned money. Once more, FUCK THAT!

Relevant to my interests

2010-05-26T11:41:00.000-07:00

Whenever Hulu.com runs an advertisement during a video, it asks if it’s relevant to me. Almost always the answer is no. But what if all ads I saw WERE relevant to my interests? Would watching ads really be that bad?

Advertisers are wasting advertising dollars when they show me a Tampax or Lexus commercial. Clearly, it is in advertisers’ best interest to show me ads for things I may actually want or need to buy. Google AdWords already does this, but very clumsily (browsing a page about craters on the moon may spur ads about acne cream). But what if ad personalization was done well? The reality is IT WILL be done well, and this means some interesting things for consumers.

Imagine in five years every single force-fed video advertisement you saw, whether on the web or on television (and in five years you will get the web through apps for your television) gave you the opportunity to rate it - a sort of hotornot.com for ads. Over time advertisers will use this data to decide if you’re a good target for their advertisement.

For the user, this means slightly more bearable commercial breaks, and a higher frequency of ads he or she may actually be interested in watching. Taken to the furthest extreme, advertisements may cease being an annoyance and become another bit of input as interesting to the user and the programming he or she is watching. This is dreadfully frightening to someone wary of the existing consumer culture, but it seems an unavoidable future.

Welcome to the Lit Department, and how's Brazil?

2009-11-13T13:33:00.000-08:00

I think people sometimes forget how truly global society has become thanks to technology. Here we are, this small blog posting articles on Sesame Street and Pabst, which are mostly read by friends and family, yet we have visitors to our site from literally all over the world.

Check out our latest site stats (click to enlarge):

Twelve visits from Brazil isn't really that much in the bigger picture, but I still love the fact that total strangers from all over the globe are finding their way to our strange little corner of the web (no, I don't think web should be capitalized, it's become a thing like the ocean, or the sky, it's far too common to capitalize).

And, people of New Zealand, get your shite together. Don't let Sweden make you look bad. Kiwis, TLD is calling on you!

Can you tell me how to get, how to get to...

2009-11-11T20:31:00.000-08:00

Since we here at TLD owe our literacy to Sesame Street, I thought we should honor the show's 40th birthday. On this week's Fresh Air, they played a compilation of interviews Terri Gross has done with various writers, actors, and musicians from Sesame Street (including Frank Oz). The entire episode is worth a listen, but her interview with Chris Surf triggered the most visceral memories. He was the musician behind the Beatle parodies Letter B and Hey Food, among others. In the interview he explains that to avoid copyright laws they tried to suggest the words and the tune, without completely copying it (something that finally explained to me why the tune is not quite right to Letter B... not that its been bothering me for 25+ years or anything). But Rebel L has got to be own of my favorites, hands down.

SESAME STREET ROCKS. Enjoy.

Rebel L:

Cookie Monster steals the show in this one:

And because of this song, I thought the Beatles really were singing Letter B, not Let Her Be (and for much longer than I care to admit):

Syllabus, November 10th, 2009

2009-11-10T13:05:00.000-08:00

Every now and then we feel the need to recommend things that we've been enjoying lately. Think of it as The Lit Department's syllabus to life. Only less academic. And less oppressive.

"Watching the Planets" by Flaming Lips (music)
This song sounds not a thing like the Flaming Lips. The low-fi vocals are vaguely reminiscent of Joy Division, and the overall feel is at once industrial and tribal and less futuristic and psychedelic than what we've come to expect — no robot wars here. But, oh, that drumming. The jury is still out on the rest of their new album, but do yourself a favor and download this song immediately. - CM

Pomplamoose (music)
They're a band, a collaboration between two YouTube sensations (Nataly Dawn and Jack Conte), and you should buy their album on iTunes. Their cover version of the late, great Jacko's "Beat It" blew up thanks to Digg.com (some Digg users strangely reacted with anti-hipster hate, which leads me to believe nerds aren't very skilled at telling the difference between hipsters and indy musicians... and yes, there's a difference), but it's Pomplamoose's cover of Beyonce's "Single Ladies" that really is the gem in their musical treasure trove. Their original tunes are lovingly crafted as well, and remind me of a cross between Feist and LCD Soundsystem, as sung by a pretty girl with a degree in French Literature. - EB

Glee (television)
If you like musicals, stories about the underdogs, pop music, country music, classic rock, mash-ups, teenage angst, flashy dance numbers, or if you ever sang in a choir, had a gay friend, fell for someone already married or dating someone else, had doubts about your career, future, or current partner, ever got slammed into a locker by the cool kids, or basically, if you went to high school ever in your whole life, you will like this show. - CM

(EB's note: I've never watched this show, but I did catch the clip of a bunch of football players performing the dance routine to Beyonce's "Single Ladies," which was mildly entertaining; also, I promise no more "Single Ladies" references for the rest of the article).

Regretsy.com (web)
There are people in this world who make gorgeous crafts with their own two hands: jewelry, sweaters, wall art, sculptures, knick-knacks, plush robots, and on and on. These people sell their wares on Etsy.com and have managed to eek out a living based on their handiwork. There are also people in this world who think your water-bottle needs a crocheted pink vagina cozy, or that you are dying for hand-painted converse sneakers depicting Bella and Edward from twilight, or that your backyard would be incomplete without a taxidermied unicorn. These people can be found at Regretsy, along with site creator, Helen Killer’s ruthless commentary. - CM

Black Adder (television)
Before seeing Black Adder the 2nd, I had no idea that Rowan Atkinson (better known as Mr. Bean) was capable of not acting like a complete idiot. And beyond that, that he was capable of portraying someone with devious intentions, moral depravity, or even wit. But that he is. The BBC series follows Mr. Atkinson, as the Black Adder throughout British history (well, a loose tie in with some historic events anyway), joined by Stephen Frye, Hugh Laurie, Tony Robinson, and a variety of other standout English actors. And, the complete series is now on iTunes, so you have no excuse for not watching it. - CM

Maybe the Navy

2009-09-07T10:06:00.000-07:00

Recently, I got the idea that possibly, just maybe, it would be a good idea for me to join the Navy. Admittedly, I know little about life in the military, and I would be among the first to hightail it to Canada if the draft was ever reinstated (I've often said the only scenario in which I'd pick up a firearm for this country was if our shores were in eminent danger of invasion, and I use eminent in the oh-shit-they-are-off-the-coast-in-battleships way, not the threat-level-orange way). Let go from an absurdly idiosyncratic sales job in Boston that takes nearly as much energy to explain as it does to perform, and faced with the prospect of moving back home broke and unemployed (which seems to be the default state for any wide-eyed English major adverse to teaching and wholly incapable of the moral flexibility entry-level sales jobs require), I realized I had obtained for myself a decidedly ungrownup existence.

I ventured in all earnestness to Navy.com, took the online personality test and found I was considered, brace yourself, creative. The suggested Navy careers were limited. I could either become a combat photographer (no thank you, if I am in combat I want the thing in my hand to go BANG, not CLICK), or I could become a Public Affairs Officer. That I could do! I imagined myself in a plain room with wood paneling and crisp blinds (think Top Gun) editing a two-paragraph press release about jet fuel, doing the sort of menial, vaguely creative task reserved for English majors unafraid of getting yelled at and doing an inordinate amount of push-ups. I did more research about becoming a Public Affairs Officer and the training involved, and in all honestly, I was interested. Besides the duty-specific instruction given by the Navy, I would have the opportunity to earn my Masters in Communications at San Diego State while a Navy officer. Not too bad, I thought.

I was directed to call 1-800-USA-Navy and speak to a recruiter if I had more questions, which I did. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Hello, I have possible interest in becoming a Public Affairs Officer.

Navy Guy: Okay, do you have any experience doing that?

Me: Um, no. I took the online personality test and that type of job was suggested.

Navy Guy: No you have any hours in marketing or public relations?

Me: Not really.

Navy Guy: [incredulously] Well, you'll be rubbing elbows with heads of state, and you'll need that kind of experience.

Me: I didn't know that.

Navy Guy: [more incredulously] Yeah, usually people applying for that have tons of public affairs experience, like working in a congressman's office.

Me: Oh, I... wasn't aware.

Navy Guy: What's your degree in?

Me: English.

Navy Guy: Where'd you go to school?

Me: University of California at Santa Cruz.

Navy Guy: Ha, really?

Me: [stunned] Is that a problem?

Navy Guy: Well, it's like saying you went to Cal.

Me: Well... I don't have... I don't have a problem with the military.

Navy Guy: [something about hippies and protests].

Me: So... you're saying I need public affairs experience before I apply?

Navy Guy: Yes.

Me: Well, thanks for your time.

So, it was quite the experience. First off I was made to feel like an idiot for not knowing anything about being a Navy Public Affairs Officer, even though I was calling a fucking informational line which I was directed to contact with more questions. Secondly, the whole University of California thing is absurd. I can't believe the guy laughed at me over the phone when I said where I went to school, and then went on to imply that not only was UC Santa Cruz somehow defective, but so was UC Berkeley, which quite possibly is the most prestigious public university in the world. Needless to say, my interest in joining the Navy has passed.

The Great Unread Love Poem

2009-08-13T10:30:00.000-07:00

I was rummaging though some old .doc files and found this gem:

Writing Not Perfect Enough For Her

Countless magical moments
I see everyday I am near thee
The kind of charm lovers sense
And brings men to their knees

The stars do act in distaste
By trying to match the beauty
Of your precious and fair face
That only blessed souls can see

True dreams are rarely sought
Before a mortal man's eyes
But when in a stare we lock
I see my dream and my soul flies

Recall when the lazy rain stops
And the sun's magic hits the mist
Remember a rainbow from an artisan's thoughts
Colors for that a blind man would wish

The feeling you get from that splendid arc
I feel when I see your smile
That feeling I know deep down in my heart
That never will fade to a quiet exile

This sugar-sweet concoction was written, I believe, when I was 16. I certainly get a kick out of it more than a decade later, and I wonder what happened to the idealist kid that wrote it. There isn't much back-story to the poem, other than its intended recipient never got it. I think I read it at an open-mic night my freshman year at UC Santa Cruz, and I apologize to all of those that attended that reading.

I recently found this next poem as well. I believe I wrote it when I was about 19. Enjoy:

Tick, Tock

A day far off
we will figure
it all out,
write a book about
it all,
congratulate
each other,
at which point
someone
will back into
the button
and
blow us all up.

Really an uplifting piece, isn't? It apparently took only three years for me to go from an unfettered romantic to a fatalistic cynic. Hooray for real life!

Twitter!

2009-07-28T18:20:00.001-07:00

Follow The Lit Department on Twitter. Check it out!

www.twitter.com/litdepartment

And, while you are at it, go tweet at your senator and demand a single-payer public health system!

A poem is never finished, only abandoned

2009-06-14T07:45:00.000-07:00

My dad once heard W.H. Auden read the poem "September 1, 1939" and commented on the infamous line "We must love one another or die," remarking that it made no sense, didn't work, and wasn't true. Auden's remark was that it had bothered him since he wrote it. He actually changed the line to "We must love one another AND die," but felt it had lost its "rhetorical punch" as one article said, so he struck the line altogether, only to reinstate it years later at the persuasion of friends.

Ah, the power of words.

I was taught once by Edward Mendelson, Auden's pseudo-protogé and literary executor. Mendelson was a strange man who couldn't handle boys wearing hats or pens clicking and once referred to my friend and me as "watermelon" when I wore a pink shirt and he wore a bright green one. Peculiar, meaningless, and yet somehow unforgettable.

Let me off the damn train

2009-05-20T17:26:00.000-07:00

Last night I was riding the T from Downtown Crossing to Davis Square when I saw a guy stuff a candy wrapper in a gap between two ceiling panels. This rather rotund young man had called himself to my attention a few moments earlier when speaking with an equally rotund girl. Rotund Girl had asked Rotund Guy if he knew any of the girls that got off at the previous stop, to which Rotund Guy boorishly replied, "I don't know any of those bitches." At that point Rotund Guy became far more interesting than the Augusten Burroughs novel I was reading, which is no easy task. My interest in Rotund Guy was further rewarded when he spat out the open T doors onto the platform at the MGH stop in what seemed to be an attempt to impress Rotund Girl.

This is a very long way of introducing the idea that one can learn a lot about a person by watching the way he or she acts while on the T. And not just on the T, but also when entering and exiting a T car or station. When a guy opens a door to exit a T station does he look back to see if he should fling the door open wide for the person behind him, or better still, does he wait holding the door for an extra beat for a stranger to pass through, or does he lazily open the door just wide enough for himself to sneak though? Does the woman wait for everyone to exit the T car before she boards, or does she brutishly shove her way on? Does the floppy-haired teen give up his seat for the elderly lady with groceries, or does he look back down and continue texting on his Sidekick? Does Rotund Guy put a candy wrapper in his pocket until he walks by a trashcan, or does he stuff it between two ceiling panels while a man 85 minutes into his commute musters a glare of fatherly disapproval?

TLD joins forces in Boston, hilarity ensues

2009-04-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

The amazingly talented and idiosyncratic Lit Department staff has relocated to Boston. Well, that is a half-truth. One half of the amazingly talented and idiosyncratic TLD staff has relocated to Boston, joining the other half that was already here. Remember on Captain Planet when all the kids combined their powers to summon... Captain Planet? Well, that's very similar to what will happen now that all of TLD is in Boston. Except there won't be any eco-friendly superhero summoning. Or hazy plot lines. But we will drink large amounts of Stella Artois.

Also, because Boston is a much busier place than Sacramento, we here at TLD no longer have time to type out The Lit Department anymore, save for purposes of illustration. Henceforth, the acronym shall take its (no apostrophe, children) place when so demanded by lack of time and/or effort. The TLD salutes you, loyal reader.

Be well.

What beet farmers read in their spare time.

2009-03-10T10:27:00.000-07:00

Yet another reason to be thankful for the Office and (gasp) Dwight: SoulPancake.

What is SoulPancake, you ask? We will let Rainn Wilson explain:

We want to make discussions about Spirituality, Creativity, and Philosophy cool again. Were they ever cool? I have no idea. But it seems like a good idea. We want to engage the user to “Chew on Life’s Big Questions”™. (I was kidding about the ™ symbol; you can use that phrase however you want. Even to sell frozen taquitos.) Where do you go on the Interwebs if you want an irreverent, fun, and profound take on God and Art and the Soul and Faith and Beauty? Fox.com? Maybe. But maybe also here at SoulPancake.com.

Thanks to Penny for alerting us of this awesome awesomeness.

Obama breaks my heart for the first time

2009-02-15T18:00:00.000-08:00

On February 6th, President Obama signed an executive order establishing the White House Office of Faith-Based and Neighborhood Partnerships, which is a mild reinvention of the previous administration's Office of Faith-Based and Community Initiatives. The White House press release on the matter describes the new White House program as "a resource for nonprofits and community organizations, both secular and faith based, looking for ways to make a bigger impact in their communities, learn their obligations under the law, cut through red tape, and make the most of what the federal government has to offer." Blah.

Basically, the program doles out federal money to religious and non-religious groups providing various social services. Anyone with even a passing interest in the separation of church and state should be concerned with the mere existence of such a federal program as it gives taxpayer money to religious organizations. Regardless of how religious organizations are intended to use the funds, the action of giving public money to such groups is constitutionally problematic. Futhermore, Obama's new Office of Faith-Baised and Neighborhood Partnership DOES NOT alter the previous administration's decision that faith-based groups receiving public funds are free to discriminate on a religious basis when hiring employees. This is absolutely contrary to a 2008 speech Obama gave, in which he noted the following (my emphases):

Now, make no mistake, as someone who used to teach constitutional law, I believe deeply in the separation of church and state, but I don't believe this partnership will endanger that idea – so long as we follow a few basic principles. First, if you get a federal grant, you can't use that grant money to proselytize to the people you help and you can't discriminate against them – or against the people you hire – on the basis of their religion. Second, federal dollars that go directly to churches, temples, and mosques can only be used on secular programs. And we'll also ensure that taxpayer dollars only go to those programs that actually work.

I am more than saddened Obama's deep belief in the separation of church and state has wandered towards the shallow end.

Iceland 1, The Rest of Us 0

2009-02-13T08:24:00.000-08:00

This is really freakin' cool. Iceland is basically run completely on sustainable energy already (harnessed geothermal from their many volcanoes, mostly) and now are installing a hydrogen-fuel infrastructure. Some of their buses and government-owned vehicles are already hydrogen-fueled, in addition to a whale-watching boat.

Since their power infrastructure is already sustainable, one could argue that there is no need for hydrogen, since driving an electric car would be zero emissions, and that technology already exists (and is arguably less-explosive), but Icelanders counter that having to recharge a vehicle doesn't work in such a sparsely-populated country, and wouldn't work for boats who can be out to sea for weeks at a time.

It does sadden me that the only countries capable of these kinds of progressive initiatives are small, rich (well, formerly rich) states like Sweden, Denmark and Iceland, but maybe eventually their successes will trickle down to our land of gluttony. Go Iceland!

Syllabus, February 11, 2009

2009-02-11T13:06:00.000-08:00

Every now and then we feel the need to recommend things that we've been enjoying lately. Think of it as The Lit Department's syllabus to life. Only less academic. And less oppressive.

The Guggenheim Grotto (music)
The Lit Dept. was first introduced to this male Irish singer-songwriter duo by a free download of their single "Philosophia" on iTunes a few years back, and the song has been a mainstay on our playlists ever since. Their melancholic lyrics, lilting melodies, and at-times almost bluegrass sound offers the perfect soundtrack to cry to, or to dance along to, depending on how your day is going. And their indie-musician aesthetic and Irish accents don't hurt either (if you're into that sort of thing). - CM

Born to Be Good (literature)
This new book by Dacher Keltner explores, what he calls, the Zen Romantic theory of, well, humanity. It looks like a self-help book, and we admit, we were weary when we started reading it. But in the first chapter alone Keltner draws from the research of Charles Darwin, the teachings of Confucious, theories of economists like Fehr and Schmidt, and on and on. It's fascinating insight into, well, goodness, and the evolution of human emotion, and is engaging and easy to read, and leaves you feeling—you guessed it—good. - CM

Penny Plastic (web)
Penny's blog manages to keep a theme—how to navigate your way out of debt— without getting hung up on the boring money, numbers-crunching side of things. Full disclosure, she's a friend of the Lit Dept. But would we be friends with someone who didn't have the charisma and gravitas to maintain they're own engaging blog? Thought not. - CM

The Vanilla Roobois (om nom nom nom)
Tea Latte (with soy milk) at Starbucks. I know, I know, corporate monoculture at its worst. But it's so damn good. Especially mid-winter in Boston. And roobois is actually good for you. And, again, so damn good. - CM

Running
We never thought we'd live to see the day when we enjoyed running. So many fond memories of faking illnesses and injuries to avoid the dreaded cross country run on Fridays in high school P.E. It's even more ironic that our favorite sport is soccer, which is essentially 90 minutes of all out sprinting behind a black and white ball. But we've recently become acquainted with the joys of treadmill running (particularly when you live in a climate with an average winter temp of 20 degrees F), and one of us was even kicked off said treadmill for overstaying her the gym's peak use time limit. NEVER thought that would happen. - CM

Pub Quizzes
English and History majors unite! Here is a time to exhibit your otherwise unappreciated and functionally useless collection of facts. Capital of Ecuador? Quito! Dickens first published work? The Pickwick Papers! Just make sure you bring along a science geek or two for all those pesky questions about mercury and mitochondria. And hopefully they'll pick up the beer tab as well thanks to the high-paying jobs they got right after finishing school. Those bastards. - EB

True fix for economy? Cancel my student loan debt

2009-02-10T08:42:00.000-08:00

As Jon Chattman at HuffPo points out, padding bank execs wallets as the rest of us attempt to bail out our tiny sinking rafts isn't really gonna help matters. Enter Robert Applebaum, an average Joe trying to make ends meet, and at 35, still dealing with a sizeable amount of student loan debt. He has started a Facebook group and a petition to back his genius solution: Cancel student loan debt to stimulate the economy.

As someone crippled by her own chunk of debt, this idea makes me giddy. And, unlike most stimulus plans being tossed around, sounds like it could actually work. Just think of how many young professionals could suddenly toss an extra 100, 200, even 500 bucks a month into the economy if they weren't saddled with debt. I could afford to maybe take a vacation, buy a car, splurge on some fancy new shoes every once in awhile. This would have a serious effect on consumer confidence (and on retailer revenue).

So, cheers to you Robert Applebaum. Unfortunately, I think there's no chance in hell this will ever happen... But then again, that's what I said a few years back about a certain awesome presidential hopeful.

Bank of America takes taxpayers money, spends it on beer

2009-02-02T09:38:00.000-08:00

Despite a near collapse that required $45 billion in federal taxpayer bailout funds, Bank of America sponsored a five day carnival-like affair just outside the Super Bowl stadium this past week as President Obama decried wasteful spending on Wall St.

Is this what they're doing with all my overdraft fees?

Bastards.

Superpowers as superheroes

2009-01-26T15:55:00.000-08:00

I’m hesitant to link to this article, because the larger context enunciates a fear that has likely been hovering within many of us as of late, and that, frankly I don’t wish to discuss or dwell on. That being said, I always think its fascinating to see how America is viewed from the outside, and Charlie Brooker, the TV columnist over at the Guardian offers up such a brilliant passage about what recent years have looked like from across the pond, that I can’t resist:

For the last eight years, watching America at work was like watching the scenes in Superman III where Superman, under the influence of red kryptonite, goes "bad" and grows stubble and gets drunk and starts vandalising the city and shouting at kids. He's only stopped when his geeky alter ego Clark Kent magically fights his way out from within, and stands blinking before him, in his nerdy suit and thick glasses. Evil Superman scowls, and the pair have a cathartic bust-up in a junkyard - at the end of which Evil Superman is finally vanquished. As a battered but unbowed Clark Kent gazes up at the heavens, the theme music swells, and he pulls his shirt open to reveal - ta da! - a fresh, clean Superman costume he'd been wearing underneath the whole time. Then he flies off and beats up Robert Vaughn or something, which is a shame because until then it had all been a pretty good metaphor for the redemptive spectacle of last November's election. And now it's just a silly action movie I probably shouldn't have mentioned in the first place.

So nice to know we’re seen as the good Superman again.

The top ten cars to get you laid in 2009

2009-01-23T22:30:00.000-08:00

We enter 2009 with the global financial landscape in ruin, and the environment pretty much in similar condition. Priorities are different, and people are concerned with things that weren't even periphery concerns just five years ago. Suddenly it's sexy to be shrewd with money and nice to the earth. And there is no better way to prove how sexy you are than driving a sexy car.

But what's sexy now? Certainly not anything ostentatious or obscenely expensive. Certainly not a douchey H2 rolling on 22s. Today a sexy car is practical and green. With this in mind, we here at The Lit Department have painstakingly assembled a list of the top ten cars that will show off your sexiness and surely get you laid in 2009 and beyond.

10. 2009 Honda Fit

This funky looking little spark plug of an import manages 33 mpg on the highway and starts at just $14,750. Its 117 horsepower engine might not rumble the nether regions of a passersby, but the Honda Fit’s practicality oozes sex appeal (it’s even a hatchback, rock on).

9. 2009 Ford Escape Hybrid / Mercury Mariner Hybrid

There may not be a less sexy phrase than Ford Motor Company thanks to a recent history of shitty cars; however, Ford is surviving the current economic downturn without taxpayer bailout money, and that makes them alright in my book. The Ford Escape manages 34 mpg in the city and is the only vehicle on this list useful for hiding a body or moving furniture. Unfortunately, the Escape starts just shy of $30,000.

8. 2009 Camry Hybrid

Nothing is sexier than being sexy without trying to be sexy, and the Camry hasn't tried since its introduction in 1982. It's reliable, it's roomy, and projects so much common sense that others may ask for advice on restructuring a failing mortgage. It get about 33 mpg around town and starts around $26,000. Plus the Camry's safety ratings are excellent, allowing one to more safely engage in highway nookie shenanigans.

7. 2009 Prius Hybrid

Some may be surprised that this isn't the top dog on our list, especially with its outstanding mileage numbers (45/48 mpg) and pseudo-reasonable price (around $22,000). This is one ugly car though, and practicality can only go so far. Plus, the rear seat is useless to anyone six feet or taller thanks to the sloping roof design. Still, the Prius is a solid contender, even if it tends to project smugness a little more than sexiness.

6. 2009 MINI Cooper

First off, this thing is a crackerjack of car. It's a hell of a lot of fun to drive and goes around corners like it's on rails. It's cheaper than the Prius by a few grand, and still gets 37 mpg on the highway. Add classic MINI styling and some German engineering (it's made by BMW) and you've got a fuel efficient car that's fun to drive, fuel-efficient, and cool to look at. This makes the MINI Cooper a sexy little beast. Rawr.

5. 2009 Civic Hybrid

A Civic? Sexy? Well, sort of. First, there are the vital statistics: 45 mpg highway, 41 mpg city, base price around $23,000. More importantly, Yahoo! (in consultation with Environmental Defense) gave the Civic Hybrid its highest rating for environmental friendliness. If you peek at those ratings, you'll notice the Prius got the same high rating, but the Civic Hybrid prevails because it's made by Honda, a company that was named the most eco-friendly of all U.S. car manufactures by the UCS, or Union of Concerned Scientists. Just how concerned? We don't know, but it's a good bet you will get far more tail than the UCS in this super-green and reliable Civic.

4. 2009 VW Jetta TDi

Speaking of German engineering, the Jetta TDi is a damn cool ride. This Jetta's clean diesel four-cylinder engine delivers 41 mpg on the highway, while also producing a zippy (and not in the way a Prius is "zippy") 140 horsepower. This means the new TDi can go from zero to sixty miles per hour in under nine seconds. It's the first automobile to meet the world’s most stringent emission control standards, California’s Tier II, Bin 5 (no, we have no idea what that means either). At just under $22,000, the TDi is a better buy than any hybrid on the road. Plus, it's a chic looking car, especially when compared to the goofy Prius, or the the quirky MINI. It's eco-friendly, it's cool, and it's sure to save you enough money on gas to afford some sexy underwear.

3. Walking

You want to be eco-friendly don't you? Then why not move to where you can walk to your job? Better yet, quit your job and start writing anti-pollution poetry in iambic pentameter while you mulch yesterday's leftovers in a handcrafted bin made of organically grown hemp fibers. No, on second thought, don't do that. That would almost be as douchey as rolling in a H2 with 22s on it. But keep walking, because that's sexy. You'll lose weight, reduce you carbon footprint, and get more opportunities to smile at attractive strangers you pass on the sidewalk.

2. Riding a bike

Walking is great and everything, but sometimes you don't have all afternoon to get across town. Plus, you get the chance to plaster your bike frame with band stickers and carry a messenger bag covered in Green Peace and Sierra Club buttons. And it's fun. People forget how much fun it is to ride a bike. It's like going back to being seven and cruising around the neighborhood with a baseball card flip-flip-flipping on the rear wheel, or pink tassels dancing in the wind.

1. Taking the subway

Nothing says sexy in 2009 like mass transportation. If you're taking mass transportation it means you most likely live in a city that cares about civic infrastructure, and that means you're somewhere cosmopolitan and relatively progressive. You're in a cultural hub filled with art, restaurants, museums, and the tangible electric buzz of human life all around you. That is being alive. That is eco-friendly. That is sexy. And that will get you laid.

The city on a hill

2009-01-23T11:31:00.000-08:00

I am currently reading The Wordy Shipmates by Sarah Vowell, and last night it occurred to me how perfect this book is to be reading at this moment in history. Though the book is admittedly much denser than her predecessors [such as Assassination Vacation, a witty romp through presidential assassination history( and yes, I said "witty" and "romp" and "assassination" in the same breath)] and one of my favorite books of all time] it strikes on such a perfect cord for this blog—the intersection of literature and politics, and hope.

Vowell's shipmates are, of course, the puritans. They leave England in the midst of social and political unrest—Vowell reminds us that these puritans aren’t saints, but they are wordy. They hold literature and learning in high regard, and will produce a large volume of texts while settling the Massachusetts Bay Colony. One of the most famous of these texts is actually a sermon delivered by John Winthrop in 1630, which contains now well-known phrase, “The city on a hill.” Reagan liked to use this phrase often in his speeches, often adding “shining”… as in, we are a shining city on a hill.

It’s lovely imagery. And if I were about to set out on a lengthy, highly risky journey across the ocean in a tiny wooden ship, I too would want to hear that I was heading to a shining city on a hill. But its meaning is so complicated.. those who inhabit a city on a hill are literally looking down on the world. They are leading by example. They are closer to God. The phrase alone creates a hierarchy. We are on the hill, everybody else is not. Obama, I believe, has never uttered this phrase. But even he alludes to it.

Another part of this phrase is the idea of hope. The idea that even when our country is so clearly in the ditches, most of us still have this place in our hearts where the idea of “America” is something bigger. Even during the last eight years, as we watched scandal after scandal drag this country’s name through the mud… even as we continued to fight a war no one wanted… even as we threw out the Geneva convention… even as the economy sank through the floor… we continued to have hope somewhere in our hearts that this would pass. We continued to somehow be grateful for being in this mythical “America.” And, it is most likely because of this idea that somehow we should be a city on a hill, that the atrocities of the last 8 years have been even more painful. How dare they shame us? How dare they destroy the ideals and hope that have been so intrinsic in the nation since they day our forefathers crossed the ocean to start this country. And how painful still that the one’s committing the crimes were our own elected officials. The ones many (though not I) voted for, with hope, four and eight years ago.

And believe me, I am in no way glorifying the settlers or what they did. The plagues they brought upon the native inhabitants, the capitol punishment imposed on heretics and non-believers, the legacy of an intermingled church and state, the legacy of puritan ideals that we have tried so hard to escape.

But they did have one legacy that we can be proud of. Hope. To them, it was in large part faith in their God. But also just hope.

And so as I listened to President Obama’s inauguration speech on Tuesday, I thought again about this idea of America as the shining city on a hill. He, too, referred to it in a way:

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of shortcuts or settling for less.

It has not been the path for the faint-hearted, for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame.

Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things—some celebrated, but more often men and women obscure in their labor—who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life. For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West, endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

We can only infer that traveling “up the long, rugged path” lead us to the shining city. But President Obama’s message has always been about hope. About restoring this ideal to America. He continues:

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions—that time has surely passed.

Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

Somehow, to me, his speech felt like the one Winthrop gave to the Puritans before their journey. Warning of perils ahead, naysayers behind, but instilling hope that better things were possible, that with hard work, perseverance, and hope, they could reach that city on a hill.

And so here we are again, setting off in stormy seas, hoping to reach a better America.

This makes me inexplicably happy

2009-01-22T07:55:00.001-08:00

Obama in the Oval Office, sans jacket. Suddenly, all seems right with the world.

Showing "respect" for a political office

2009-01-21T09:26:00.001-08:00

There has been some talk about the lack of respect some citizens have shown George W. Bush as he leaves office. There have been demonstrations throwing shoes on the lawn of the White House, and at a large effigy of George W. himself wearing that "Mission Accomplished" flight suit. Groups have gathered in D.C. to sing "Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye" both during election night, and on inauguration day as George W. left D.C. for good.

Any elected official, even the president, deserves no more or less respect than any other citizen. The leader of any nation, if elected by the people, is given power only through that electoral process, he or she is not royalty and should not be treated as such. Blindly bestowing respect to a politician because of the position he or she holds does not allow a democracy to function effectively. The best way to "show respect" for any democratic leader, and the democratic process, is to express one's political views and to get involved in the political process oneself.

Singing "Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye" as a politician leaves office, no matter the politician, is an inherently democratic act, and, I would argue, demonstrates a form of non-violent dissent our nation needs to thrive.

Reading between the pronouns...

2008-10-14T07:49:00.000-07:00

Today’s New York Times featured a profile of psychologist James W. Pennebaker, and his work analyzing word usage as a cue to psychological well-being and intentions. His work has helped to monitor the progress of therapy on victims of trauma, to analyze the threats of terrorists such as Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahri, and most recently, to examine the electibility of the presidential candidates. By counting how many pronouns are used (and what type of pronouns, I vs. we, etc.), and analyzing incidence of positive vs negative and specific vs. vague words through the use of a special software called LIWC (Linguistic Inquiry and Word Count), Dr. Pennebaker asserts that he can tell a confident person from a shy one, a liar from a honest man, etc.

His theories are most interesting in application. While Pennebaker’s blog, Wordwatchers, examines all four of the candidates speech patterns, I highly recommend the analysis of Gov, Palin’s word usage. The most interesting aspect of this analysis is looking at how Palin’s word usage shifts drastically between her speeches (likely written by experienced members of the campaign) and her in-person interviews with the likes of Gibson and Couric. Her lack of specific words, under usage of “I” and over-reliance on non-exclusive words, suggests a level of deception not present in the other 3 candidates speech-patterns. Read the full post here.

The conclusion of the blog puts it best, “Using less ‘I’ and fewer exclusive words is a hallmark of deceptive language or spin. She might find more empathy than pity in her audience if, when cornered, she admitted her shortcomings rather than unsuccessfully evading the truth.” Amen.

Bigotry is alive and well in America

2008-10-12T12:37:00.001-07:00

News-Leader.com, based in Springfield, Missouri, reported on Friday about the below sign depicting Barack Obama wearing a turban. The creator of the sign has not come forward, lending credence to the idea that bigotry is always accompanied by cowardice.

CBS news posted the following video today of a man at a Sarah Palin rally in Johnstown, Pennsylvania. He appears to be holding a Curious George doll with an Obama sticker placed on it. Once he realizes his actions have been caught on camera, he ditches the Obama sticker and gives the stuffed animal to a young child in front of him.

A YouTube channel, Morrill Majority, posted this following video of the same "gentleman" waiting in line before the event.

Finally, we have the following video posted by TheUptake.org on their YouTube channel. A supporter at a McCain event in Lakeville, Minnesota said, "Obama is an Arab." To McCain's credit, he corrected the woman.

Watch CBS Videos Online

The last clip is upsetting on several levels. So what if Obama was an Arab? Would that make him less of an American? And less of a human? I fear what the answers would be to those questions in many parts of this country.

Furthermore, Obama is not an Arab, he is the son of an American mother and a Kenyan father. The above woman's ignorance of these facts worries me that she has gotten her information about Obama from right-wing talking heads rather than her own research.

I suppose that would be too much to ask of an American though, thinking on his or her own.

An election season glossary

2008-10-08T13:05:00.000-07:00

Since this is purportedly an arts & entertainment blog, I’ve decided to take a literary slant to my political rants. So, here you are… a current events glossary

clean coal (noun) as oxymoronic as it sounds. See this recent Slate article for the most informative explanation I’ve seen.

hockey moms (plural noun) the Alaskan equivalent of soccer moms, only replace the minivan with a giant SUV, and the starbucks latte with a shotgun. Affinity for pit bulls. And lipstick.

gotcha journalism (noun) an attempt to ask straightforward questions and get straightforward answers, apparently.

Joe Sixpack (noun) an insult masked as a rallying cry for Middle America. An attempt to lure tired, working class, beer drinking American men to vote for the pretty lady in November. Often married to Hockey Moms.

Main Street (noun) in media terms, the “real world,” i.e. not Wall Street. But more popularly, anywhere in Middle America where common sense loses out to fear-mongering, libelous calls to arms. There is a Main Street in my town, but judging from the Obama lawn signs adorning it, it doesn’t count.

maverick (noun) a word that used to bring to mind pre-Scientology, Navy-hot Tom Cruise in his flight suit. Now, a substitute for offering a substantive answer at debates or in interviews. Usage: “What do you plan to do about the economy?” “We’re gonna bring our maverick ways to Washington and do mavericky things, cause we’re a coupla’ mavericks, gosh darn it!”

middle class (noun) apparently, suckers tricked into thinking the GOP is looking out for them (or even better, that GOP politicians are actually a part of the middle class), only to suffer the greatest at the hands of their failed policies.

time-line (noun) traditionally, a plan with dates and times in mind. New usage attempts to falsely suggest the word is synonymous with an admission of failure or surrender.

Remember civics?

2008-10-01T10:30:00.000-07:00

The U.S. Citizen and Immigration Services has released the new, revamped questions of the citizenship test, which they’ll be slowly phasing in to completely replace the existing test by Oct. 1, 2009 according to this CNN article. The new questions are arguably a bit harder, in that some ask slightly more abstract questions. (“What does the Constitution do?” versus “What is the Constitution?”… although to be perfectly frank. The Constitution doesn’t do anything, aside from sit in its case and wait for the GOP to slowly eat away at its underlying purpose.)

Now, I ask… could you pass the new test?

To be a citizen, you would have to correctly answer 6 out of 10 questions, randomly chosen by test-givers from 100 questions. (The USCIS publishes all possible questions and acceptable answers for would-be citizens to study, so there is no trickery involved).

So, here are 10 randomly-selected questions for you to test your civics knowledge:

The New Test

1. The idea of self-government is in the first three words of the Constitution. What are these words?

2. What do we call the first ten amendments to the Constitution?

3. What stops one branch of government from becoming too powerful?

4. The House of Representatives has how many voting members?

5. What is the name of the Speaker of the House of Representatives now?

6. There are four amendments to the Constitution about who can vote. Describe one of them.

7. Who wrote the Declaration of Independence?

8. There were 13 original states. Name three.

9. What did the Emancipation Proclamation do?

10. What did Susan B. Anthony do?

To see the answers and the full list of possible questions, click here.

America's brightest rally against Obama

2008-09-27T14:25:00.000-07:00

I was convinced by the below speech that my support for Obama is misguided. Okay, not really.

In all seriousness, this nation is one strange place. Did you catch the fact she supports Hillary Clinton? This is bizarre.

A non-voter's confessional

2008-09-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

I'm ashamed to say I haven't registered to vote since I was a senior in high school. My political awareness at that time was well represented by the fact I registered as a member of the Green Party. That changed yesterday, though. I drove my usually non-political self to the Democratic Party Headquarters of Placer County, donated $15, registered to vote, and left with an Obama bumper sticker and lawn sign.

A slim middle-aged woman with short hair and wire rim glasses answered all my questions regarding the voter registration form. I wish I had gotten her name because she was very kind and helpful.

The bottom line is, if you've never registered to vote, bite the bullet and drive to your local Democratic Party Headquarters (odds are, if you're reading this blog you are not a fan of that other political party). The process is easy as questioning Sarah Palin's qualifications, and odds are there will be someone with wire rim glasses and a friendly disposition to answer all your questions and help you through the process.

The Placer County Democratic Headquarters is located in Auburn, CA at 1015 Lincoln Way.

Visit http://www.placerdemocrats.com/ for the phone number and office hours. Obama 2008!

To continue our political trend as of late, I want to point out these clips from The Late Show with David Letterman.

Background: John McCain cancels on Letterman a few hours before the show taping Wednesday night, citing his need to fly to D.C. immediately to help solve our current financial crisis. Dave gets upset. McCain instead stops briefly to chat with Katie Couric that same night. Dave gets more upset. On Thursday's show Dave shares how McCain didn't actually leave for D.C. until the following morning. Dave's still upset.

Wednesday night's clip:

Thursday night's clip:

Separation of Church and State? Never heard of it.

2008-09-19T11:49:00.000-07:00

My apologies for hijacking this blog recently for sociopolitical content... but with the election on the horizon, I feel safe that politics have entered the pop culture sphere for the time being.

The cause du jour: Patients Rights. On the surface the Bush administrations latest foray into theologically-motivated legislation seems to only affect women, but the wording is so vague and open to interpretation, it could not only limit access to abortion and contraception, but ANY medical procedure a provider deems objectionable: H.I.V. tests, vasectomy, etc.

An Op-Ed in yesterday's NY Times (thanks to Archetype for the heads-up) by Hillary Clinton and Cecile Richards (Planned Parenthood's president) states the case against this proposed legislation remarkably well. Read it. Especially this part, "The 30-day comment period on the proposed rule runs until Sept. 25."

UPDATE: The instructions for commenting, as excerpted from the draft proposal (available for viewing as a PDF here in its entirety): You may submit electronic comments on this regulation to Regulations.gov or via e-mail to consciencecomment@hhs.gov. To submit electronic comments, go to the Web site and click on the link “Comment or Submission” and enter the keywords “provider conscience”.

Out my window I see Times Square

2008-09-18T22:48:00.001-07:00

Recently, or should I say at this very moment, I have realized this blog has certain themes. They are, in no particular order at all: sweatpants, beer, The Office, and/or left-wing cynicism, and/or the phrase and/or. I salute The Lit Department for its awesomeness.

Also, I salute Carly B. for attracting the attention of Our Body, Our Blog and provoking an utterly anal-retentive comment from that same group. I sadly received no such recognition for my groundbreaking article on beer choice and its relation to female reproductive rights in the post-Regan era.

So, have you ever been to NYC? It smells. They never tell you that. Everything from sewage, to grease, to burning plastic, to that unmistakable dive-bar smell that wafts under one's nose like a freshly uncapped Sharpie. It's not a bad thing though, it's just how it is, and the sweet Irish accent of some of the bartenders makes it all highly bearable.

The race is on…

2008-09-17T12:08:00.000-07:00

A little round-up of news items that have crossed my desk/inbox today.

First, this insightful post from the ladies over at Our Bodies, Our Blog, the writings of the Boston-based Women’s Health Collective that is generally at the forefront of women’s health advocacy. While during the primaries their blog was heavily pro-Hillary, they are now strong supporters of Obama/Biden for the ticket’s decidedly more progressive (read: not stone-age) stances on health care, reproductive rights, and reality.

Next-up, the NY Times columnist we love to hate: Maureen Dowd. When she isn’t pissing off men, women, feminists, misogynists, right-wingers, liberals, PUMAs, Ann Coulter, your mother, your pastor, her editors, etc… she is writing well-researched investigative Op-Eds, along the lines of this week’s trip down Palin’s memory lane. Ms. Dowd visits Wasilla, Alaska and discovers what it’s like to live in the shadow of Miss Popular, aka Sarah Palin. I’m starting to understand why she has so many fans (if you are perplexed, netflix Mean Girls and talk to me in the morning).

Another NY Times article more thoroughly explores Palin's political experience, and lends more ammo to the Mean Girls theory. A quote from Laura Chase, Palin's former campaign manager from her 1996 run for Wasilla mayor: “I’m still proud of Sarah, but she scares the bejeebers out of me.”

And lastly, this email forward, of unknown origin, which I will paste in its entirety for you here:

I'm a little confused. Let me see if I have this straight.

If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you're "exotic, different."

Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers: a quintessential American story.

If your name is Barack, you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track: you're a maverick.

Graduate from Harvard Law School and you are unstable.

Attend five different small colleges before graduating: you're well grounded.

If you spend three years as a brilliant community organizer, become the first Black president of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional law professor, spend eight years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services Committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.

If your total resume is: local weather girl; four years on the city council and six years as the mayor of a town with fewer than 7,000 people; 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people; then you're qualified to become the country's second-highest-ranking executive.

If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising two beautiful daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian.

If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, left your wife, and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.

If you teach responsible, age-appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex education in your state's school system, while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible.

If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's.

If your husband is nicknamed "First Dude," has at least one DWI conviction and no college education, didn't register to vote until age 25, and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.

Okay... much clearer now.

And in response to the other bizarro blog I read today, which I will not link to, because its author has already used the number of page-clicks as proof of the veracity of his claims (rather than the more likely sheer astonishment of readers who click to the blog to verify that this kind of lunacy does really exist, and then quickly realize, as I did, that by reading his ranting, I am somehow validating his crazy… oh the guilt). Just trust me, he’s crazy, don’t bother googling and visiting the blog, you’ll be just another page-click in his arsenal. Basically, the gist is, he is suing Obama for illegally running for president because Obama is not a US citizen. Though Obama has the Hawaii-issued birth certificate to prove it, and it has been vetted by various fact-check types, and by the way, McCain was born in PANAMA. Yes, inside the U.S. zone, but the constitutionality of that is tenuous at best, and well, isn’t all of this a bit irrelevant in today’s world, and wouldn’t focusing on, oh say, THE ISSUES, instead of Obama’s passport, Palin’s lipstick, etc., etc.

Phew.

Remember to vote. Wisely.

What your beer choice says about you

2008-09-16T14:12:00.000-07:00

The following suppositions of character are completely without base, and most likely only 98% accurate.

Blue Moon: You have ovaries, and have visited (more than once) a bead shop and/or pottery-painting store.

Budweiser: You are the everyman, and dare not rock the boat. You drive an American truck (probably a Ford F-150) and would love to "do" Pamela Anderson.

Chimay: You are a graduate student currently investigating the homosexual tendencies of Gilgamesh, and/or Sumerian marital pottery.

Coors Light: You wear sweatpants and flip-flops to Applebee's. Seriously. Knock that shit off. Also, you find setting up a game of beer pong absolutely appropriate at your niece's 5th birthday party.

Corona: You pop your collar and call women bitches. Most likely, you wear a Livestrong wristband, or some variation thereof.

Fat Tire: You drive a '92 Honda Civic complete with a Dennis Kucinich bumper sticker. You really love The Office, but tell anyone and everyone that the British version was better.

Heineken: You are trying to be different, but really you crave validation from your peers just like everyone else. Also, you secretly love cheesy trance music.

Miller Light: Your narcissism strongly suggests you drink a low-calorie brew, but your checking account demands you forego Michelob Ultra or Budweiser Select

Pabst Blue Ribbon: Certain acronyms come to mind: PBR, GHB, STD, and/or DUI.

Thanks to Jessica C. for her help!

Definition of lit

2008-09-12T17:55:00.000-07:00

So, why is this blog called The Lit Department? A brief examination of the word lit is in order.

Lit is most commonly used as the past tense version of the verb light (I want to light Sarah Palin's hairsprayed bouffant aflame; I lit Sarah Palin's hairsprayed bouffant aflame). Secondly, lit. is used as an abbreviation of literature. Lastly, lit is also an adjective meaning lighted, but no one really cares because lit also means intoxicated or under the influence of drugs. These multiple meanings can be useful. Observe:

While lit, I lit the lit lit. department.

Confused by the litany of lit's? Translation:

While drunk, I set on fire the well illuminated and/or concurrently burning literature department.

Therefore, The Lit Department is a well-illuminated department of literature that has recently been set on fire while under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs.

Hipsters and what makes Pabst awesome

2008-09-12T13:56:00.000-07:00

Borrowing (stealing) the idea from gawker.com, here is what you missed in midtown Sacramento if you haven't made it out there recently. If at any point you giggle and/or cackle, I don't recommend going to Club Lipstick at Old Ironside's on Tuesday nights. Photos courtesy of Takeover Tokyo.

Requisite creepy old guy in a Hawaiian shirt.

No good can come of this.

Buddy Holly does shiny.

Infamous drunk girl salute.

The three stages of "He's cheating on me!": anger, drunkenness, and melancholy.

Gloira Steinem still fighting the good fight.

No words.

Sir Phil Collins

2008-09-06T12:50:00.000-07:00

The universe works in mysterious ways. First, at a party a few weeks ago, I was inexplicably pulled into a conversation defending the musical talent of Phil Collins. I was never a fan of Genesis, but I'll admit to having liked a few Phil Collins songs in my day. But a friend – who is a musician himself, and someone whose musical tastes and opinions I generally respect – dedicated a large portion of the evening extolling the merits of Sir Collins (and his drumming talent), and explaining why we all should stop overlooking his work.

Two days later as a I sat in a plane waiting out a weather delay on the runway, I found NPR on the satelite radio (I heart JetBlue) and was excited to find that This American Life had just started. The topic – break-ups – was a good one, made even better by the first segment by Starlee Kine (of Flight of the Conchords and Daily Show fame). On her quest to write the perfect break-up song, Kine consults heartbreak-song expert Phil Collins himself. The interview is remarkably candid and entertaining, and gave me a newfound respect for the man and his music.

And the culmination of all things Phil Collins: Today at work, someone introduced me to this YouTube Video. I am speechless. And can't get "In the Air Tonight" out of my head.

I'll admit it, two weeks ago I was thoroughly ambivalent about Sir Collins and his work. But the universe clearly has big plans for the man. And truth be told, I do really dig some of his songs. The man clearly has a talent for transforming heartbreak into melancholic musical bliss.

Too bad I discovered all of this about 5 months after he officially announced his retirement from the music biz. Timing is everything, my friends.

A YouTube artist you should check out if you like cute female Canadians

2008-08-30T17:38:00.000-07:00

So, from what I can tell, midnightfirefly14 is girl from Canada named Sam, and she has a sister named Tiff. Sam has posted some sugary-sweet acoustic covers of popular tracks (even "Umbrella," ella, ella, aye, aye, aye) featuring her and her sister. Sam and Tiff are very cute, pretty talented, and utterly young. It seems Sam and Tiff have a bright future, but then again their nation does have universal healthcare, and we all know how awful that is. Check out their nice cover of "Sweet Surrender" below.

Sam has also posted original songs as well. Link is below.

http://www.youtube.com/user/midnightfirefly14

Supporting artists from everywhere with Gawker Artists

2008-08-27T18:11:00.000-07:00

You may notice that there is now a Gawker Artists banner on the side bar to the right (scroll down a bit if you can't see it). The Lit Department is now an exhibitor for Gawker Artists, which is tres chic. This is how Gawker Artists describes what they do:

Gawker Artists promotes the works of artists of all mediums. Participating artists receive free profile pages and a select group have their images published on Gawker Media titles. When you spot one of these images, click on it to read about the artist or browse our collection by artist name, medium or location.

So, if you see a piece of art you like displayed on the Gawker Artist banner, click on it! Support a young, starving, attractive, heart-broken, and possibly depressed artist out there somewhere on the interwebs. All proceeds go to the artists.

P.S. Look, we are on gawker.com, sort of.

Doogie does DANGER!

2008-08-25T20:05:00.000-07:00

I have but one directive... Get thee to Hulu.com and watch this piece of sheer genius, otherwise known as Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

I won't give you much to go on, except: Doogie Howser + Joss Whedon + slightly blatant but ultimately forgiveable iPhone product placement = AWESOME.

That is all.

YouTube ukulele goddesses

2008-08-24T20:31:00.000-07:00

One of the coolest things about YouTube (besides the bloopers from The Office) is the multitude of singer/songwriters that post original work and covers. This post is dedicated to my favorite female ukulele songstresses (now THAT is a random group of people to discuss in any depth) of YouTube. And yes, they tend to be on the adorable side.
Julia Nunes, http://www.youtube.com/user/jaaaaaaa

Julia Nunes rocks the ukulele, and has quite the collection of fun/folky covers. Her original stuff isn't half-bad either, but her main appeal seems to be the quirkyness of covering pop songs on the ukulele accompanied with her earnest and sweet vocals. It seems she just finished an album, and she is selling it through snail mail, which is both awesomely old-school and silly.
Clara Bell, http://www.youtube.com/user/ClaraBelleMusic

I'm not going to lie, Clara is on the list because she is simply gorgeous, stunningly so. She has a very sweet voice, even if her performances are sometimes as energetic as a sloth on Xanax.

Sweetafton23, http://www.youtube.com/user/sweetafton23

Sweetafton23, also known as Molly Lewis, wins the award for the girl I would most like to have a beer with. Her original song about the crazy female diaper-wearing (allegedly) astronaut is brilliantly funny (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YrUwqc0sF7U).

Even sweatpants can see I am no Hunter S. Thompson

2008-08-23T22:49:00.000-07:00

I suppose the first rule of responsible journalism is not to get drunk when covering a story. Luckily I am neither responsible, nor am I a journalist.

Last night I went to a show at Marilyn's on K in Sacramento and proceeded to drink heavily, stopping only briefly to scribble barely legible notes on the back of show flyers. From what I can tell, a three-piece band from Modesto called Sapo Sueño played, and they were well-rehearsed and fairly tight. My notes include the phrases high school rock, Radiohead-esque, voice not suited for metal, and playing too hard for their britches. A friend of mine saw my notes, and said I was being too critical. At this point, I have no clue.

Next up was The Dirty Feet (self-described as Pink Floyd meets Tool). Great sound, nice vocals, but I was distracted trying to figure out why the bassist was wearing sweatpants. I guess when you rock that hard, comfort comes first.

Then came A New Hope, and I really enjoyed the show. They pull off the live hip hop thing very well, and the funk-slanted backing meshed with some nerdcore-ish mic skills make for an interesting sound. Oh, and another pair of sweatpants showed up, this time rocked by A New Hope MC, Prozak. It really was a banner night for elastic waistbands. Pseudo-journalistic bit: Prozak cites influence from The Pharcyde and The Fat Boys. Word.

Sex Rat also played, but at that point I was outside speaking in tongues. It may have been the first time anyone has gotten genuinely blitzed off Michelob Ultra. Band links below.

http://www.myspace.com/saposueno
http://www.myspace.com/thedirtyfeetband
http://www.myspace.com/anewhopecrew
http://www.sexrat.net/

Fun with domain names

2008-08-23T22:20:00.000-07:00

So, every self-respecting blog needs a catchy domain name. Brave China-tackling Carly suggested going with litdept.com, and I agreed. Sadly, some prick out there in the interwebs owns that name, and isn't using it for shit. On top of that, that owner of litdept.com is auctioning it off. Minimum bid: $99. Fuck.

Anyway, thelitdept.com wasn't taken, so I grabbed it. Hooray! The Lit Department now has a proper domain name of its own, even if it's heavy one demonstrative adjective.

http://www.thelitdept.com/

Yeah, that wasn't so bad to type.

I admit I wasn't sure how to classify the word the. So, after some intimate time with Google, I found the below page.

http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/002974.html

I've never thought reading about the word the would be so interesting, but then again I was an English major.

Be brave, bold Dean

2008-08-22T15:05:00.000-07:00

Dean Haakenson is the heart of Be Brave Bold Robot, which is very appropriate because he may very well be the human personification of love. If you've seen him play live then you know that Dean lays it all on the very sweaty line every time he picks up his guitar and gets behind the microphone. There's nothing artificial there, and there's nothing artificial on the Be Brave Bold Robot self-titled release either. It's a punk-folk-rock-soul collision echoing Elliot Smith, Counting Crows, and whoever it was that sang Puff the Magic Dragon (Peter, Paul & Mary). Lyrics are everywhere, sometimes belted out, sometimes delivered as stilted half-raps, and they are worth listening to. If you don't know Dean Haakenson before you listen to this record, you will after. Melodically, this album does nod occasionally to pop sensibilities (you may even hear a chorus or two or three), but it never approaches Mayer-esque song construction, which from my point of view is a good thing. Fear not though, there is always a beat to dance to.

Dean is joined on the album at various points by a varied cast of characters, including Matty Gerkin (who also adds some electric guitar) and Thomas Minnick on bass, Andrew Morrin on drums, Rocky Rupple and Heather Phillips with backing vocals, Eric Talley on cello, Jeremy Pagan on lead guitar, John Bellizia on banjo, and Alisha Jurick on clarinet. All in all, the record is a product of love, and love seems to make everything okay. You don't often find a banjo, vibraphone, cello, stand-up bass, and clarinet all comfortably nestled on the same record, but they recline well here.

Visit http://www.myspace.com/bebraveboldrobot to buy the album and see show dates.

Off-off topic, but of concern...

2008-08-22T08:53:00.000-07:00

Though I realize the focus of this blog is arts and music, the only thing on my mind this week is China. And to be fair, this issue hits on something extremely important to any form of art: freedom of expression.

When the Olympics kicked off last week in Beijing, over 840 million Chinese tuned in to watch the opening ceremonies on CCTV. Compare that with 34 million in the U.S.—still the largest audience of any non-U.S. held Olympics opening ceremony. Global viewership was estimated to be in the billions. Yet, while the world watched the now infamous 9-year-old Lin Miaoke lip sync the “Ode to the Motherland,” there were many people who either chose to boycott the ceremony (me included), or were unable to watch because they sat in a Chinese prison, jailed for their attempt to protest the games or speak out for Tibet.

Since Beijing was granted the Olympics in 2001, China has spent billions to make the 2008 Olympics spectacular. The Birds Nest – their Olympic stadium – is a magnificent piece of architecture to be sure. But at whose expense has the massive redevelopment of Beijing taken place? Earlier this week, two elderly women who were relocated as part of the redeveloped filed for a permit to protest at the games because they assert that they were never compensated--as promised by the Chinese government--for their relocation. Instead of being granted the right to protest in one of the pre-designated protest areas set up by the government to limit disruption during the games, however, the women were sentenced to a year in a Chinese labor camp for “disturbing public order,” according to the South African Times.

Since the Olympics began on August 8, over 70 applications for protest permits have been reviewed by the Chinese government, but not one had been approved. To the impartial observer it seems that this application process is a convenient way for the government to know who is planning to speak out, and to quickly arrest them before they can tarnish the image of Big Mother China. Applying to protest seems like walking into a lion’s den if you ask me. Just in trying to co-operate with the police and following all procedures required to protest peacefully, protesters are arrested. You can imagine what happens to them when they speak out without prior permission.

One disturbing example is the Chinese human rights lawyer Gao Zhisheng. According to the International Herald Tribune, Gao disappeared a year ago after speaking out against harsh treatment of Falon Gung practitioners, who have been routinely oppressed and persecuted by the Chinese government. Reports of Gao’s subsequent torture have been documented by the Tribune, which writes that according to the Sound of Hope Radio, Chinese authorities stripped Gao naked, "threw him to the ground and attacked him with electric batons."

Meanwhile, the Detroit Free Press wrote this week that 6 Americans were arrested Tuesday for holding up a “Free Tibet” sign and waving a Tibetan flag (which are banned in China) outside the Birds Nest stadium. The Americans were members of Students for a Free Tibet which has staged many small similar small demonstrations throughout the games, most ending with protesters being arrested and subsequently deported. This time, however, the Americans are reportedly being held on 10-day detention, perhaps a sign that the government is trying to crack down on these demonstrations in advance of Sunday’s big closing ceremonies.

Among others recently detained are a number of Associated Press photographers who were simply trying to do their jobs and take pictures of the protests. They were released after being “roughed up” and having their camera’s memory cards forcibly confiscated.

It’s extremely sad to me that the unity and competitive spirit that the Olympics typically represents has been tarnished by its being held in such an oppressive country. Even those athletes who tried to silently protest the games while competing by downloading an album of Tibetan protest songs from Apple’s iTunes were awarded with the subsequent ban of iTunes in China.

Meanwhile, the Chinese government is reaping great rewards from the newfound media exposure, and the boon of advertising dollars flooding into the state-run broadcasting system CCTV. “That was part of the idea of having the Games in China - opening new markets for the Olympics," Ben Seeley—a spokesman for the International Olympic Committee—admitted to the International Herald Tribune. Of course, Seeley likely meant exposing the Olympics to new faces in China, but in reality, this Olympics has been all about exposing news faces to advertising from the West.

To all of those who take comfort in the idea that the Olympics are not political, and thus are worth watching despite the political controversy surrounding it: The Olympics are profiting China. China is host to a number of political atrocities and crimes against humanity. The Olympics are profiting crimes against humanity.

I know that my boycott of the games has no effect on the pockets of advertisers, of the minds of politicians, and doesn’t directly help those jailed for expressing their beliefs. But I can’t bring myself to cheer for a competition that is taking place on the backs of the repressed. Especially since the list of those repressed by China has grown substantially in recent years: journalists, students, Tibetans, human rights lawyers, the poor, the elderly, the list goes on and on and on.

My only hope is that once the flame is extinguished on Sunday, the plight of those negatively affected by the games and by the Chinese government will remain in the minds of the one billion plus viewers who have tuned in for the past few weeks. We shall see.

For a list of articles cited... go to: My Delicious Page.

Alright Eric, feel free to revoke my admin priveleges. I probably just got your blog banned forever in China.

An interview with Dean Haakenson of Be Brave Bold Robot

2008-08-18T21:41:00.000-07:00

Dean Haakenson (right) outside Luna's in midtown Sacramento.

When did music become something you just absolutely had to have in your life?

I think I could answer that two ways.

On the one hand, I think I realized that music, the musicality of things, was a necessary part of life, something that permeated every thing around me, from a young age. I can remember making noises with my mouth, and thinking they were fun to make, and, you know, always singing along with the radio. I guess everybody has done that, but something about my memory of it all tells me that I always knew that music is for any and all that choose to embrace it. I wish I would have kept up with those mouth noises, I'd be a much better beatboxer now.

So, on the other hand, the part of "having music in my life" that incorporates the slightly regimented processes of writing chord progressions on the guitar, and writing words to sing, and then singing them, and playing that music in front of people, I think I started to realize that all of that was a necessary part of this role I had assumed right around when I was hitting my twenties. I had always sang loudly to the music I loved when I was in high school, and I even played a folk song on the guitar in front of my senior class., so I loved music, and didn't mind trying to play it in front of people. I realized I wasn't shy, very very nervous and anxious, yes, that's built into my personality, and I don't fear it so much the more I play, but I realized that I tend to express that anxiety in an outpouring of myself instead of an internalizing. Even though I was playing rehearsed guitar chords and singing in front of people, I don't think I truly understood what it meant to be a musician, someone who has to have music in their life in a practical, experiential creative way.

I still don't think I exactly know what it means to be a musician, and I have a hard time calling myself that as I have a whole lot to learn about guitar and music theory, but I have now known since, I was, to name a number, 23, that I absolutely have to have music in my life, and, like all our muscles, it is something that I must keep in my life to become more experienced and familiar with it, and it is something that will make my life and the lives of my children and all around me richer

Short answer - early twenties, when I realized that practice makes one better at something.

You mentioned that your performance anxiety leads to an outpouring of self when you play. What sort of reaction do you perceive audience members having in response to this?

I think, in general, they "like" it. I think people inherently like anything that looks and feels honest, and that's what I think is perceived when I am performing and letting it all hang out, so to speak. I get a little spastic, my anxiety makes my heightened heart rate and frenetic muscle movements cause my body to start sweating and sweating. I am urged to speak into the microphone. I usually don't know what to say, and sometimes that's very apparent, and I speak gibberish, but sometimes, something funny and poetic comes out, but always, always, I think it is perceived as something honest. It's like desperate lustful sparking electrical wires of nerve and vibration flailing out into the abyss of the audience, just hoping for any sort of connection.

I also think that it puts some people off. They came to see a musical show presented in a professional and straightfoward way, and are a bit embarrassed for me and wish I wouldn't say the same thing over and over and would just play the damn songs, but half of that perception is my own self-deprecation and I think the other half rationalizes the whole thing this way: even if I am perceived as an embarrassing pile of childish nerves, then at least I have expressed myself, and I think that is more important than anything, and, if I have to off put a few folks to make some drunkies laugh, that's pretty important too. Yeah , I think my unabashed visceral ramblings and nervous nincompoopery connect with people's baser instincts in a way that does more good than bad.

Where's your favorite place to play in Sacramento?

I don't really have a favorite, per se. I appreciate the different feelings that the different venues give me, each one having its own stage and bar and audience area configurations. I have played lots of shows at The Fox and Goose Public House; the old wood in that place, and the friendly bartenders who I have come to know, and the comfort of performance that has come through playing there so often, those things make it enjoyable to be at The Fox and Goose. I've also played at Marilyn's a bunch of times now, and I like the big stage, and the also friendly bartenders and the tall tables. The sound systems at Marilyn's and Old Ironsides are pretty good. Luna's is a nice intimate stage place, and the owner Art is a really nice guy. I don't know, I think after a while, and after a bunch of varied experiences at each venue, it's hard to pick a favorite.

There was this place in Old Sac called The Speakeasy, I don't think they do shows there anymore, but I enjoyed being at that place because the building was so old, and when you walked outside to have a smoke, you were in the middle of the Old Sacramento old brick buildings, and I love old buildings, and that was a big plus to that place. I know that I have certain feelings about venues where I haven't played that many shows. Old Ironsides, The Blue Lamp, I've only played a couple shows at those places so the thought of playing there still feels new and exciting.

Back to the music. A lot of your songs seem to share a lot of yourself. While writing a new song, have you ever written a lyric that you soon realize you aren't ready to sing in public quite yet because it's too personal, or seems too recent?

What's the saying, "All stories are fiction?" Something like that. I think that's very true. Well, as true as "There is a bit of truth in every lie", etc. I think it comes down to how easy it is for me to share my private life with others., and it's not hard at all for me. Live out loud, etc., and don't be afraid to tell other people things. Either they'll appreciate your honesty, or they will judge (in which case, fuck them), or they won't care.

That's the part that sucks, displaying your intimate details for somebody who doesn't appreciate the fact that you just shared part of yourself. But one who is willing to freely drop their intimates all around, must not be offended when others do not pick them up, I tell myself.

Where was I? Oh yes, I certainly do write from a personal perspective. It's just the easiest way to formulate the details of a story when you have them fresh in your memory, but I must always interject a bit of fiction to fill in the details, and sometimes, although I will write in the first person, the story is entirely or mostly fictional, perhaps spawned from a line about some sort of existential sentiment that I thought up when I was thinking about homeless people or something, but ends up being something completely made up, that sounds completely true. So, when I blur the lines between what really happened, and what could have happened, I end up just trying to tell a story, and it makes no difference to me what people think about it, or if it's true, or how sad the actual experience actually made me. In that sense, I regard myself with zero seriousness, as opposed to my actually personal experiences, which I can sometimes be far too sensitive about. Sometimes? What?!

I tend to think that the best art shares a piece of the artist with the outside world. Do you agree? Assuming you do, how do you react when you see an artist that isn't making the connection between the internal and external?

Unless the artist was attempting to be ironical or mocking or trying to make a point about affected expression, I think that I would think they were boring as shit. Art is honesty, I completely agree. There is a whole lot wrong with this world, I think. I don't have any answers, I don't even dedicate much of my time to figuring out how to make it a better place, but one thing I do know is that when I see somebody who is not allowing themselves to connect their internal with their external, I feel as though everything would be a whole lot easier and logical and fulfilling if they did.

I want to get that person to "see the light," and I want to have a conversation with them just to see if I can draw their insides out, but I don't think I would really enjoy observing or applauding somebody who embodied that sort of fake energy in any sort of performance setting. I'd just change the channel, or go do something else, or something...

Complete subject change. If beer was a friend, what type of friend would it be?

Beer would be a complex friend indeed. Pretty much about as complex a friend as we are "friends" to ourselves. I think foremost, beer would be an enabler, one of those friends that lets you believe that EVERYTHING that you do is exactly the right thing. Now, a variation of that is usually inherent in the people we call our good friends, because we want to be around people who think that we are funny and wise and capable of good decision making, but most of our friends would probably say something if they saw us making bad decisions (drinking to excess every night, ravenously pursuing the services of sex industry workers, etc.). In fact, I think the older I get, the more I appreciate people in my life who point out most of my mistakes and shortcomings,it challenges the enlightenment seeker inside of me, but that, my friend, is not beer. Beer is a yes man, blindy loving everything I do. The only reason I think I would still listen to beer is because his convincing agreement goes down with unwavering smoothness. Sure, you have to put up with some occasional poopy panties, small messes in the bathroom, but it's worth it. Hell, people marry trophy husbands and wives, and put up with the impending dissatisfaction for those same reasons. The luxury of a an amber cream top telling you how wonderful you are. I could ponder that with the eventual realization that a full time friendship with beer is something that will lack the hard work of self-improvement and the experience of relationship growth, that one would eventually end said relationship with Beer, but, I tell you Eric, I don't know how to break it to him gently, so he keeps coming around. Don't tell him I said any of this, PLEASE.

So concludes this interview, and Dean, don't fret. I will not tell beer any of this the next time I see him, although I always thought of beer as more of a she. How else could beer so easily break my heart?

Only the first word of an article title is capitalized, right?

2007-10-10T14:34:00.000-07:00

And with these few words I am becoming one of those people. You know, those people, the ones that vomit thoughts into the blogosphere as chimpanzees throw excrement into... well, wherever it is chimpanzees are throwing excrement into nowadays. I'm not sure either hurled object does much good, but they both seem like good, clean fun... minus the vomit and excrement. And a-way we go.